Posted by: cordy74 | April 24, 2009

Beauty is in the Eye…

As a soon-to-be father (now over 4 years ago) I had many worries.  Among these were the concerns that I had absolutely no idea how to care for a baby and that I didn’t know if we could even afford to have a baby and maintain the lifestyle to which we were accustomed.  Along with these, other concerns would flit in and out of my mind in the days and weeks leading up to the impending birth.  The one that kept recurring was the concern that I wouldn’t love my daughter as much if she wasn’t a cute baby.

What brought this on, you ask?  I was sitting in the waiting room of my son’s pediatrician a few weeks ago and happened to look around the room.  There just happened to be the usual assortment of parents and children.  There was a pretty good mix of what I like to call “regulars” and “goblins”.  I saw the Tattooed Guy with his son, a cute kid. There was a mother and her daughter.  You could tell they were related, but not bad looking.

Then there was the White Trash Mommy with her kid and Grandma in tow.  Talk about a goblin.  The kid, not the Grandma.  How can this woman seriously think her kid is adorable when it looks like that?  I’m sorry but, sheesh!  This kid didn’t just look like it had been smacked with an ugly stick.  It looked like it fell through an ugly tree, hitting every branch on the way down.

Oh, what was that?  You say I’m heartless?  Wrong!  I’m realistic.  I’m taking a stand here.  We all know deep down that some children are just not cute.  Everyone knows it’s true, I’m just the only guy with enough guts to say it out loud.  If you really think that all babies are cute you are simply lying to yourself.

I’m going to be perfectly honest here:  when my son was born he looked like a wrinkled little alien.  That’s right!  I said it and I’m not taking it back.  Of course, once he started to put on some weight he really came into his looks.  Now he’s cute as a freaking button.  I’ve heard looks a lot like me.  Draw your own conclusions.

Laugh all you want.  This was a real problem for me.  I was very troubled by the thought that we would have an ugly baby and I would know she was an ugly baby.  It has been said over and over that every parent thinks their children are beautiful.  I happen to think this is a load of crap.  Maybe it’s just referring to the fact that everyone thinks their kids are beautiful on the inside.  At any rate, it was never a problem for us.

As luck would have it both of our kids happen to be quite adorable.  How do I know this?  I have had many people tell me they are cute.  Not to mention the fact that I have two eyes of my own and a brain in my head.  I have seen it and I know it.

If you can honestly say that you can love your children just as much whether they are homely or cute you are probably a better person than I.  For I have seen many a baby out in the world and they are not all good looking.  We’ve all heard the saying: “it takes all kinds.”  I guess that’s true.  You’ve got your cute babies, your average babies and then you’ve got your real uggoes.

If you think your kids are adorable that is just fine by me.  Everyone is entitled to their own opinion.  Just don’t get all defensive when I don’t agree with you openly or even if I cringe and shudder when you ask me if I want to hold your baby.  If the kid looks like a cross between an orc and a meerkat I am not going anywhere near it.  Deal with it.

Do you think your kids are really cute?  You are probably wrong.  They can’t all be lookers, can they?


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